Geocache at a Little Free Library

Someone on Twitter brought up Geocaching the other day, and I decided that I should give it a try.  Here’s the video footage.

Another event that happened recently was a “Dirty Ninja Mud Run” and all three of my children partook in the event. Here’s the footage of my kids totally tearing it up!

That’s all for now.  Hope you’re having a good summer, just like my family is!

Promoting O.K. is Great on my Tips4Running YouTube Channel

If you’re a casual follower of this blog, you may not know that I lead a double life.  No, I’m not Batman.  Then again, Batman and I have never been in the same room at the same time.

I’m getting off topic.  What I mean to say is that I have a YouTube channel called Tips4Running where I make videos about tips for running.  My persona on there is “Coach Tief” because I was a collegiate runner, and a track and cross country coach after I graduated from college.  I’ve got a lot of subscribers on YouTube, so I’m using that site to push my book, O.K. is Great, out into the world.  Here’s the quick video promo I made.

Happy Trails,

Coach Tief!

Starting at Zero (64/365)

I’m in awful shape.  I think it is safe to say that I am in the worst physical condition I’ve ever been in my entire life.  Every time I see our scale in the bathroom, I slowly back away.  I don’t even want to know what my official weight is right now.  I’m sure it’s a personal record.

Now, I don’t mean like I’m in terrible shape as in I’m physically ill.  The worst off I’ve ever been as far as that is concerned is when I had to get my appendix removed.  That’s another story in itself, and it’s a classic.  I’ll have to go into detail about that later.  I mean, I have zero endurance, and no strength.  This is coming from a guy that ran college track and cross country.  Back then, I was in ridiculously good shape.  We would go for eight mile easy runs.  Yes, I said that right.  In my current state, everything is difficult after eight steps.

I’ve been waiting to get back at it because my knee is not quite right.  I hurt it playing too much basketball and soccer in the fall.  I stopped the soccer because I was just helping out at my son’s soccer practices, and the season ended.  I stopped playing basketball in January because my knee doesn’t agree with lateral movements.  I’ve also been waiting on working otu because I like running outside, and Wisconsin in the winter is harsh.  As I type right now, on March 5th, it is 12 degrees Fahrenheit.  If you convert that to Celcius, it’s like negative 42.  I might be wrong with that conversion.  Point is, it’s well below freezing, and it’s MARCH!  When will it get warm?

No more waiting.  I’m soft because I’m soft.  I should make a meme out of that quote.  My body soft.  It’s nice and squishy like a marshmallow.   My willpower is soft like a freshly baked donut.  Apparently, eating stacks of pancakes doesn’t give you muscles like a burly lumberjack.  You have to do hard work too.

Do you really need an excuse to eat blueberry pancakes?

Do you really need an excuse to eat blueberry pancakes?

No more.  I must step away from the blueberry pancakes.  I have to work out!  It’s time to HTFU.  Look that up if you don’t know what that acronym means.  It’s NSFW.

I battled with the brutal weather yesterday and squeaked out a half mile run.  Then I came inside and played Just Dance for 20 minutes with my kids.  Today will be no different.  I need to build up my beach body.  Muscle up, butter cup!  Wish me luck.

The Sandlot meets Diary of a Wimpy Kid (42/365)

During the summer, I spent my writing time turning my first book (which isn’t published yet) into a movie script (which hasn’t been filmed yet, nor is it even close to that level).  One thing that was fun about it though was speaking with a film maker named Dan Dobi.  Just as a point of reference, I met him through our love of YouTube.  He made a great documentary about YouTube called Please Subscribe, and I applied but failed to get a role in it.  Don’t worry.  It didn’t ruin my relationship with him.  I’m not a serious, full time YouTuber, so I knew I wasn’t going to be cast in the film (That movie is on NetFlix by the way).  Here’s my audition tape, if you’re wondering.

I’m off task again.  Anyways, one thing we were looking for when we were putting together the pitch for my screenplay to producers was a comparison.  Apparently, the people with the money want to know what the movie will be like by comparing it to other movies.  That’s how we came up with “The Sandlot meets Diary of a Wimpy Kid”.

It’s simple, and, for my book at least, it’s fairly accurate.

My book, “O.K. is Great” involves a 12 year old kid who’s main goal is to break the mile record for gym class.  His full name is Otis Kowalewskee, but his initials are O.K. and everyone calls him that.  Otis thinks he’s cursed to be O.K. forever, but his dad convinces him to actually try hard at something instead of just accepting mediocrity.  It’s like the Sandlot because there are a lot of sporty scenes in the story like playing football, wrestling, and of course, running.  There’s also the whole angle like Diary of a Wimpy Kid about this kid being small and not fitting in at his middle school.

Here’s a picture from the book.  The bigger kid is Stu, and O.K. is the kid in the headlock.  It’s an illustrated book, and I drew the pictures.  The book is written in the first person perspective of O.K., so the comments by the picture are his thoughts.

OKGheadlock

Now, only if some publisher would show interest in the book, or a producer would show some interest in the movie!

The Best Diet Book Ever, FREE – Guaranteed Weight Loss – (39/365)

***I’m only kidding at the start, but my Diet Book really is free***

Because I’m a running guru, and an Internet sensation, I get approached to promote countless products. (I actually do have over 10,000 subscribers on YouTube. I’m kind of a big deal.) Most of the money is in the diet and nutrition side for product promotion because people will pay lots of money for you to tell them why they are fat.  Now, I’ve never once agreed to promote any of their products, fancy gadgets, and weight loss miracle food plans.  You know why?

Well I’m here to tell you why!  I hold the secret (a heavily guarded secret by the fat cats in the food industry).  Matter of fact, now that I posted this article onto the Interwebs, my very life is in grave danger.  Don’t worry.  You can share my secret.  I’m going into hiding after this and changing my name to Divad instead of David.  They’ll never find me.

Stand back.  Hold the phone.  Brace yourself.  Hide the women and children.  Umm, I’m running out of things to say to build the drama.  Here it is.  My Best Diet Book Ever for FREE!

DietBook

Did you read my book?  Great stuff, right!  Eat more fruits, vegetables, and whole grains.  Eat less of everything else.  I kind of ran out of room with the word ‘everything’ on the front cover of my book, but I still think it has a chance to be a best seller.

Can a free book be a best seller?  I’ll be like U2 after they dumped their album into everyones’ iPhone and made people want to delete it.  So cool!

Okay.  That’s it.  You don’t even have to look the inside cover of my book.  There is no inside.  It’s just that picture I drew with a blue marker and a green crayon.

At the start of the article, I mentioned my running background.  Here’s an informative video I made about running to lose weight.  I mention the same stuff about diet in that video too.

Feel free to share my unbelievable weight loss secrets, but eat an apple or a carrot first.

How Cold is Too Cold? (8/365)

How cold is too cold?  I think I have an answer.  It’s rather disturbing, and I apologize for even sharing it, but if your boogers freeze when you take a breath in through your nostrils, it’s too damn cold!

Have you ever had that happen to you?  It kind of hurts.  After you breathe out, the mucus in your nostrils will unfreeze, but man that’s cold.  That reminds me of the coldest I’ve ever felt.

I went to college at the University of Wisconsin-Oshkosh, and when I was there, I ran on the cross country and track teams.  During a terribly cold winter, myself and about five of my teammates went out for a run in sub-zero temperatures.  I don’t know the exact temperature it was during that four mile run, but it was somewhere between booger freeze cold and hell freezing over.

I made two critical errors during this run.  First of all, I started the run with the wind.  This gave me a false sense of how cold it really was outside.  The second mistake I made was to lower the scarf that was covering my face.  During the first two miles of the run, when I was headed downwind, my face was warm enough without the scarf.

Oh, but did things change when I turned around to head back to campus.  The wind and cold slapped me across my bare skin wicked hard.  It felt like I was getting poked with thousands of little needles.  I reached up and attempted to put the scarf back onto my face, but I couldn’t.  It was frozen around my neck.  The water vapor from my breath collected on it and then froze.

I could have been in The Shining!

I could have been in The Shining!

I spent the next agonizing two miles running with one hand over my face.  My feet felt like blocks of ice by the time I reached campus.

When I finally made it back inside, I immediately went into the bathroom to run hot water over my hands.  The image I saw in the mirror was ridiculous.  A crust of ice had formed on the front of my winter hat.  Small particles of ice were in my eyebrows and eyelashes.  My face was burnt scarlet red from the wind.  The scarf was frozen solid around my neck.  It took a good five minutes to undo the frozen knot and take it off.

Miraculously, I didn’t get frostbite.  Keeping one hand over my face somehow prevented this from happening.  It probably helped that I ran the two miles back to campus in ten minutes.

Now, I’m smart enough not to run in these temperatures.  Unfortunately I’m not smart enough to run consistently when it is nice out.  I need to get back into good shape, but that’s a story for another day.

I’m Too Much of an Idiot to be Successful

On November 16th, 2014, an email account that I never check punched me in the face so hard, I still have tears in my eyes.  Here’s why.

I have a moderately successful YouTube channel called “Tips4Running”.  As the name suggests, the videos I produce are focused on running tips.  I also like to use my GoPro camera when I run in Tough Mudder races, and I post these videos too.

I’ve been busy with school and with writing lately, so I haven’t uploaded a new video in some time.  Over the weekend, I found some free time, and I made a new running video.  While it was uploading, I was checking the different pages on the Tips4Running YouTube channel, I visited the “About Tips4Running YouTube page”.  On this little page, I wrote, and I quote, “Coach Tief is currently seeking sponsors, partners and product samples to review. Contact him at the following email.”  Then there is a link to an email account that I haven’t checked for six months.

So, I thought, let’s check out that email address while I wait for my video to load.  I get on the email account, and there are 364 emails I haven’t read.  Quickly I filter through them.  Most of them are spam, but once I get past about 200 emails, I find an interesting one sent to me on August 15th.  It was sent by Tina Theriot, with a title of “Edge of Tomorrow – Tough Mudder”.  I open the email, and this is what it said, word for word.

Dear Coach Tief,

On behalf of Warner Bros. Home Entertainment Group and EDGE OF TOMORROW, we would love to invite you to participate as a member of our team at Tough Mudder: Seattle on September 27th and 28th.  Our goal is to create a version of the “J-Squad” as seen in the film, with a range of team members from celebrities, YouTube personalities, top tier media, fitness gurus and even contestants from American Ninja Warrior.

As a participant on the EDGE OF TOMORROW team, we will pay for air travel to and from Seattle, hotel accommodations for two nights and the ticket entry fee.  In return, we ask that you help promote awareness of the Blu-ray/DVD release of EDGE OF TOMORROW and the great time we guarantee you will have by participating with us!

We think you would be a great addition to our team and would love to discuss this opportunity further.  Please let us know your interest and availability by Friday, August 22nd. Please feel free to email us any questions or concerns you may have.

Thank you!

Tina Theriot

Associate Marketing Specialist

Warner Bros. Home Entertainment

“NOOOOOOO!”  I screamed to myself.  How could I be so stupid?  How could I miss out on something like this?  This is the whole reason I make the running videos!  I want to do cool things like this, get footage of it, and then share the videos with my viewers.  I pay a lot of money to run Tough Mudders, and I could have ran one for free, not to mention I could have done it with American Ninja Warriors and other YouTubers!  Plus they were going to pay to fly me out there, and pay for the hotel.  I’m such an idiot.

Hi.  I don't like to check my email.  I'd rather run in mud.

Hi. I don’t like to check my email. I’d rather run in mud.

Needless to say, I’ll be checking that email account daily from now until forever.  I’m going to try and make this right somehow.  I know I’ll be running another Tough Mudder in 2015, and I’ll make a video for that.  Tonight, I’m going to rent or buy the movie EDGE OF TOMORROW and watch it immediately.  Then I’m going to email back Tina from Warner Bros. with my sincerest apologies.  They probably didn’t miss me at all, but I still feel really bad about the whole thing.  I only have myself to blame.  I hate me!

Tough Mudder Chicago

Hey everyone!  I just finished the Tough Mudder Chicago this weekend.  For Christmas, my wife bought me this really cool camera called the GoPro 3.  You can wear it on your body and tape you doing stupid things like running an 11 mile race with 22 obstacles and tons of mud.

You can watch my experience right here.

– Dave

The Tough Mudder Poem

Tough Mudder

My nemesis, my friend

Twelve miles and 25 obstacles to conquer

to reach the end

Mix teamwork, toughness, imagination,

and a handful of dread

add physical prowess, endurance, strength,

and your own messed up head

What you have is a wonderful

yet toxic mix

that only a brutal

Tough Mudder course can fix

To the Tough Mudders

I salute you

Here’s mud in your eye

and more for your shoe

I’ll be with you this weekend

through the fire and in the ice

over water on funky monkey bars

ready for shocks oh so nice

running up and down hills

and climbing up a few walls

I’ll be sweating and smiling

even as I trip, slip, and fall

This is what we’re all made for

to become one with the earth

this is where our ancestors hunted

this is where we’ve belonged since our birth

with the sun at our back

or the rain in our face

life is like a Tough Mudder

it’s a challenge, not a race

DSC00375

Tough Mudder Poem

– David Tiefenthaler

Tough Mudder in Chicago

Holy buckets.  The Tough Mudder Chicago is coming up wicked soon.  On Sunday last week, I ran six miles and felt pretty good.  This weekend, I guess I should go for seven.

Do you not know what this Obstacle Course is?  Here’s video of me running it last year.

 

Wish me luck.  My wife and the kids are all coming to watch this year.  Hopefully, I remember to take off my new wedding ring before the race this time.

– Dave