Did you see the latest episode of The Walking Dead? Carol scared the snot out of me! She is in the middle of stealing some guns in the new town they are living in, and a random kid catches her in the act. The kid says he has to tell his mother, and Carol goes dark. She said some of the most sinister things I’ve ever heard.
Carol was all like, “So kid. Don’t tell your mom or else.”
The kid was like, “Why not?”
That bothered Carol so she said, “Because I’ll give you some cookies.”
The kid was undeterred, and replied with, “But I tell my mom everything.”
Then things got real. Carol got all up in this kid’s personal bubble and said, “Not this you won’t. If you tell mom this, I’m going to do some wicked bad things to you. You’re going to go to sleep, and then when you wake up, you’ll be tied to a tree. You can scream all you want, but no one is going to hear you. Actually, something is going to hear you, but it’s not going to be your mom. Instead, it will be the zombies that hear you. They’ll come out and tear into your flesh while you’re still alive. How’d you like that, little buddy? So don’t tell mom, and I’ll make you some cookies.”
I’m not a huge Twitter user, but I sent out what I thought was a hilarious tweet about the different kinds of cookies that Carol could make for that little kid.
— David Tiefenthaler (@Tiefsa) March 9, 2015
I got zero retweets and zero favorites. Apparantly, other people were funnier than me. Here’s some of my favorite responses to the hashtag #CarolsCookies.
How about some nice prepackaged chocolate chip cookies.
— Walking Dead (@TwdAllDay) March 9, 2015
Here’s a few more that made me laugh even though I shouldn’t.
— Leah Ann✌ (@leahcakesandpie) March 9, 2015
— kimcumber (@kimcumber) March 9, 2015
— KawaiiBrandyyyy (@BrandyMuzzy) March 9, 2015
I need to put a stop to this.
— Jennifer A Sullivan (@judge_jenn) March 9, 2015