The Jack of All Trades is Dead (29/365)

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As I am getting deeper and deeper into the blogging world (I’ve only been at it for a month), I’m beginning to realize that my blog is pointless.  There isn’t any real reason to keep reading it because I don’t focus on one topic.  This journal is just a collection of my inane ramblings, and that really has no place in our world of hyper specialization.  I don’t want to find a niche.  I hate the word niche.  You have to pronounce it all weird like it’s some sort of French cuisine.  Have some quiche and make sure to focus on your niche.

But, I don’t want to write about one thing every day!  I like food, but I don’t want to have to take 46 pictures of my bowl of ramen noodles while I blog about the secret splash of soy sauce I put on it.  I like sports, but I don’t want to break down the shot selection of Kobe Bryant at home games against teams with a center that is over seven feet tall.  I like traveling, but I don’t want to visit Brazil and fish for peacock bass in the Amazon River.

Wait a minute.  I actually would like to try the last one.

What I’m getting at is the Jack of all trades is dead,  or at least he doesn’t live on an internet website.  If you want attention, if you want success, if you want money, find one thing that you are good at and then do it over and over and over and over again.

Think I’m lying.  I did specialize in something for a while.  I wrote vacuum reviews for a couple of years.  I’d get a new vacuum shipped to my house every couple of weeks, I’d run a series of tests on it, write a review, make a video, and post that article.  I got paid well, and it drove me absolutely insane.  Here’s an excerpt from the review of Dyson DC41 Animal Vacuum.

The “Root Cyclone Technology” is combined with the HEPA filters to eliminate any dust from coming out of the vacuum exhaust. The particle scanner detected no dust over 0.3 microns coming out of the Ball vacuum.

Hot damn, that’s some awesome writing!  I’m raking in the page views with my great keyword selection and SEO friendly content.  Now, fork over my money.

Take that same advice and apply it to our economy.  Refine that hyper specialized skill so you no one else is as good as you.

Maybe you’re a welder.  That’s not good enough.  Maybe you’re a scuba diver.  Not specialized enough.  But if you can weld underwater, BAM!  Success.

I got a question for ya.  How’s that chicken taste?

I'm a one day old baby boy chick, and I'm about to die!

I’m a one day old baby boy chick, and I’m about to die!

You can thank the graduates of the Zen-Nippon Chick Sexting School for your juicy chicken.  At this school, a student is trained how to squeeze a day old chick and look at it’s cloaca (the chick’s private parts) and determine if it is a boy or a girl.  It sounds easy, but apparently it isn’t.  When a chick is a day old, “there are as many as a thousand vent configurations that a sexer has to learn to become competent. The job is made even more difficult by the fact that the sexer has to diagnose the bird with just a glance.” Excerpt from Moonwalking with Einstein: The Art and Science of Remembering Everything by Joshua Foer. (Affiliate Link to Amazon).

See, the females can lay eggs, and their meat is tender, so we keep those ones.  The males aren’t so nice, and their meat is tougher.  Most of those boy chicks are killed off.  Hooray for hyper specialization.  If we had to wait six weeks to look at their feathers to determine the boys from the girls, that would waste a lot of feed, because those cocks have to die right away.

Alright.  That’s enough from me.  Enjoy this YouTube video vacuum review of the Dyson DC41 Animal.  I’m the producer, and my wife is the on camera talent.

Don’t worry if you didn’t like this post.  I’ll write about something different tomorrow.


  1. David, I thoroughly enjoyed this. The drawing even made it more fun. You’re a good writer.

  2. I’ll be checking back for your views on the new Dyson robot thingamajig that roams the house. My wife wants one when they’re released here in Australia.

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